In Which John Starts Classes

The first day of classes was great. I didn't have my first class until 6 in the evening so I had time to do other things during the day (such as do laundry and drop a class).

I ate in the student area for the first time. Oh, just so you guys back home get an idea for the campus, the bookstore, travel agency, study abroad office, post office, dentist, "In-Con," cafeteria, library, and student union are all in the exact same location (often in the same building). This makes running errands very simple. The cafeteria definitely beats the Diners at UMD. There's a sandwich place, and a vegetarian place, and a cafe place, and a Mexican place, and a Thai place, among others. Australians are big on Thai. It's like the way we Americans love Mexican food. Asia is to Australia as Mexico is to America.

I booked my Spring Break trip to New Zealand (I still need to arrange flights, but at least I have one part of the process taken care of). I'll be spending 9 days there and will get to do many things. Hopefully I'll run into Jemaine or Bret.

This week is when all the organizations on campus come out to recruit the new students (by the way, Australia starts their school year in Spring, not in Fall like us, so there are new freshmen everywhere). After gathering many bibles from the 40 Christian groups, I finally found what I was looking for: the theater group. There are two, one for musicals and one for other. I joined the other (they charge a fee to join since there is no actual dept on campus, nor classes, so they have to get money somehow). It was $10, but it bought me a ticket for their upcoming show, and gives me discounts for future shows (although hopefully I'll just be in those). The first auditions are coming up next week, and the students seemed very nice and personable. I'm so glad I found them. (I also joined a film group, but they just watch films and discuss them, rather than make them. I'll still give them a chance.)

My first class was LING120: Exploring English. It's all about grammar. Several students in the class thought "how" was a verb (the correct answer was "is"). Some weren't even sure of what nouns were. This class may end up being very easy.

The second day of classes were a little less fun. My first class was Introduction to Indigenous Studies. The professor talked to us as if we were Australians with knowledge of Aboriginal Studies. Most of us were Americans, since I recognized many from the airport or the Village. We have to do one of those "finding an article a week" assignments. (In Australia, assignments are called "assessments.")

My second class was Australian Media, and it was by far the biggest class I've ever taken. In this one, we're required to watch a lot of Australian TV. That might sound like fun at first, but I think it could get tedious.

I finally signed up for all my discussion sections, so I am officially set for all of my classes. I have nothing on Wednesdays or Fridays, so I guess I can make it to the Inc Show.

In Which John Goes to a Film Festival

Friday - There was a block party. It was hot. My roommate and I wandered around, not meeting anyone. Why should we, we already met each other? I also tried Vegemite. Allie and Billy watched. I think we've found a food I don't like at all.

Saturday - Took a personal day in Sydney. Again, I wanted to take pictures, but the rain stopped me. I went through the town of Glebe and hit up the markets, including quaint bookstores. I got a cheap copy of The History of Tom Jones, A Foundling and a not-so-cheap copy of The Great Gatsby in graphic novel form, only available in Australia.

Sunday - I went to Tropfest '09. It is the world's biggest short film festival, and it was located right in Sydney. We spent all day sitting outside in the park watching the huge screens. This was also apparently the first televised event, so you guys should have watched it on TV. Every year, there is a "significant object" that must be included in the film to ensure that it was made for the festival. This year, it was "spring." Interpret that as you will (the directors certainly did). There were some celebrity judges there, including the girl from A Series of Unfortunate Events (and the recent Unborn) and the girl who will be providing Alice's voice in the upcoming Tim Burton Wonderland movie. Alas, I didn't get to see them in person, but I saw where they were sitting.

I found that the best kind of short film tells a simple story, then has some memorable twist or reveal. So without further ado, here are the 16 finalists (warning, spoilers ahead).

The News
The Plot: A woman expecting twins can't wait to tell the love of her life the good news. The man she loves also has news for her.

The Twist: The man accidentally killed the woman's sister 6 months ago, and just never found the right time to tell her.

How Spring Was Used: The twins are due in spring.

My Thoughts: I loved this one. It was very short, and at the beginning it seemed very predictable and chick-flicky. The woman prepares her news by going through the whole story of the relationship, briefly mentioning that he comforted her when her sister died. You knew that his news was not going to be pleasant, but typical story fashion would have him break up with the girl, or something cheesy like that. When he said, "I killed your sister," that gave me the biggest laugh of the night. 4 stars (out of 4)

The Delivery
The Plot: After finishing a bank heist, three criminals wait for the call to make their delivery. There is no dialouge.

The Twists: A pizza delivery guy shows up. He's actually a cop. Then one of the criminals reveals himself to also be a cop. Then another criminal shows that he is also a cop. The final criminal embarrassingly shows that he is a cop too.

How Spring Was Used: While waiting, one of the criminals relieves stress by squeezing a spring loaded stress reliever.

My Thoughts: The reveals were kind of funny, but the waiting portion took a bit too long, and without the dialogue, it was hard to tell why they were waiting in the first place. Also, without the dialogue, the volume on all of the sounds was cranked to the max, and it got annoying at times. 2 stars

Bargain!
The Plot: An awkward girl pays her sister's hot boyfriend to to sexy things for $500. He's reluctant, but figures it is an easy way to make money.

The Twist: The awkward girl actually owed her sister $500 and was just dropping it off.

How Spring Was Used: The awkward girl claims there is a loose spring in the couch so she can sit closer to the boyfriend.

My Thoughts: I actually happened to be sitting behind the director and her friends and family, so I was rooting for this one. The main story was fine, but after the reveal, the boyfriend's reaction was a bit long and drawn out. It should have just been one shot of him realizing what happened and feeling awkward. Instead we were treated to five. 3 stars

Dream What You Want
The Plot: A man lost in an empty city finds he can only escape by dreaming that he's somewhere else (a beach). Then he comes back, to find the city populated again.

The Twist: The man has a seashell from the beach, proving that it was not just a dream.

How Spring Was Used: In the city, there is some graffiti that says, "Spring '09"

My Thoughts: Maybe this film was some big metaphor for isolation or imagination. Whatever the case, the story fell victim to cliche and it just ended up being boring to watch. And the inclusion of "spring" seemed very last minute. "We were supposed to include "spring?" Oh crap! Quick, hand me that paint!" 1 star

The Furry Cheque Book
The Plot: A 40-year-old woman lives in a spacious estate after her partner left her. In order to help with the housework, she hires hunky guys and pays them in sex. It's a documentary.

The Twist: Does it need one?

How Spring Was Used: It seems to have been filmed during spring.

My Thoughts: This one just made me feel dirty. The woman's interviews are peppered with shots of random naked guys doing hard labor. This would have made for a great 60 Minutes segment. 2 stars

Song for a Comb
The Plot: A little clay man plays around with the items in a travel bag, making music, and eventually settling on using a comb as a piano.

The Twist: ...He used the comb as a piano?

How Spring Was Used: The man dismantles a pen and takes the spring out, using the empty pen as a trombone.

My Thoughts: The film was cute, but I would have enjoyed a bigger payoff, like maybe creating an orchestra with all of the items. Instead he just plays a few notes on each item, then plays a long clunky piano song. 2 stars

Jackie's Spring Palace
The Plot: A man, who seems to think his life is more epic than it is, narrates his day as he walks around in a pirate costume and eats many spring rolls. Then he gets diarrhea and soils his pants.

The Twist: He accidentally does this while in the ladies' room.

How Spring Was Used: This one was probably the best in terms of spring usage by incorporating spring rolls into the plot.

My Thoughts: It's hard to describe this one. It's kind of like watching a person's stand-up routine happen in real life. There are funny moments, but the story just jumps around, and the genre changes without warning, and you realize it is actually very jumbled. Fortunately, the funny moments are funny. 3 stars

Being Carl Williams
The Plot: Two murderers mistake the man who played Australian serial-killer Carl Williams in a TV miniseries for the actual Carl Williams, and ask for his help in killing someone.

The Twist: After witnessing the killing, the actor thinks about the interview he was having earlier in which he described his perfect weekend. Both the real and hypothetical ones end with him watching the sunset.

How Spring Was Used: Hmm, I think I forgot.

My Thoughts: The premise was really good, and they used the actual actor to play himself. By the end, no one really learned anything, and the joke of him being mistaken for Carl Williams (by the murderers, by the victim, and by some passers-by) began to wear thin. 3 stars

Blue
The Plot: A woman sneaks away from her sleeping partner while out at a winter cabin. She treks far out into the woods to have a pee. Then she smiles.

The Twist: She was taking a pregnancy test. It turned blue.

How Spring Was Used: Apparently, pregnancy is related enough to spring to count.

My Thoughts: The woman's trek into the woods took a very long time, to the point when I stopped being curious about her journey and was just hoping it wasn't leading to some big pee joke. It almost seemed that way, too. 1 stars

Fences
The Plot: A boy accompanies his detective father to a nighttime crime investigation and is told to wait in the car. But his curiosity gets the best of him.

The Twist: The boy sees something pretty gruesome probably. Then his parents fight about how he wasn't supposed to be there.

How Spring Was Used: You got me.

My Thoughts: If I wasn't thinking "What does this have to do with spring?" the whole time, I would've liked it better. 2 stars

NYE
The Plot: A girl goes missing at the New Years festivities at the Harbor Bridge.

The Twist: None. Nothing happens beyond that. It's more an emotional piece.

How Spring Was Used: A child goes missing.

My Thoughts: See "My Thoughts" for the previous film. 2 stars

One in a Million
The Plot: A boy writes a letter about how great his father is, even though his father is obviously a serial killer (he buries dead hookers in the backyard) who threatens to kill his son if he goes to the cops. Then, his son sneaks out one day, and returns with a group of people. The leader with a megaphone tells the father he'll get what he deserves.

The Twist: The boy had written the letter to a reality show called, "One in a Million" where one lucky citizen gets his house made over, starting with the lawn.

How Spring Was Used: The boy puts his pen together, spring and all.

My Thoughts: The twist was definitely funny, but you know that boy is going to be in deep trouble. 3 stars

Left Unspoken
The Plot: Two friends of 3 years, reveal their love for one another, as well as many other secrets and facts about their life.

The Twist: An atom bomb has been heading for their country.

How Spring Was Used: One of them probably mentioned spring.

My Thoughts: First it just seemed like another sappy romance story. And there was a heavy bass rumble that was annoying me throughout the whole film. But I found the revelation that the two were bracing for death to be very sweet. 3 stars

Be My Brother
The Plot: A man with Downs Syndrome initially bothers a woman and a young guy at a bus stop. He eventually charms the woman with his antics. When he tells the woman that his brother finds him embarrassing, the woman tells him that his brother could not be more wrong.

The Twist: The other guy at the bus stop was the man's brother.

How Spring Was Used: Doesn't matter.

My Thoughts: In reading this short little synopsis, the twist seems obvious, but when you're watching the movie, the thought doesn't cross your mind. Even when the two get on the bus, and sit next to each other, I just thought the young guy eventually warmed up to the man. But when the man hugs the young guy, you are hit with a wave of revelation. The movie was very sweet, and my only other favorite of the night. 4 stars

Notes From a Scaresmith
The Plot: A guy who likes to startle people finds that he can't scare his new roommate.

The Twist: The roommate is also a scaresmith and ends up scaring him. It's love.

How Spring Was Used: The guy likes jumping out at people.

My Thoughts: Although it was cute when the roommate jumps out and wrestles the guy to the bed, it was all too predictable. 2 stars

Beyond Words
The Plot: A woman notices a creepy guy wearing sunglasses staring at her during yoga class. Afterwards, she is attacked by her car. It's a thriller.

The Twists: First, we find out that the man in class is blind. Then later we learn that the woman is deaf. It's like that Richard Pryor/Gene Wilder movie.

How Spring Was Used: Once again, I forget.

My Thoughts: The style was intriguing. The plot shifted between the two points of view. There were scenes with visuals, but no sound, and then scenes with sound, but no visuals. It came clear that the second type were the blind man's point of view, but without sound, it just seemed like a normal thriller, hence the twist of the woman being deaf. 3 stars

I didn't stay to see who won. Oh well.

In Which John Learns About Beauty

Sorry, no pictures this time.

Wednesday was another low-key day, trying to rest up from the previous night and prepare for the following. I walked around campus, and realized how truly beautiful many parts of it are. The next time I have a completely free day, I am going to take so many pictures, my camera will be full of pretty pictures.

The next day was an all-day orientation. As in, "15 hours of my life are now missing." The first half of the day session was spent talking about Australia. A Native Australian (like Native American) tried to tell us about his culture, but the students were all unresponsive, resulting in a very awkward sequence in which he shouted out common American names, expecting students to come up on stage. Only a Mary, a Patrick, and 2 Johns came, out of the 20 or so names he called.

At lunch, I found the crew from UMD to sit and eat lunch with. After 20 min of realizing that they weren't going to talk to me, I went to find other people. I finally stumbled across a group of guys who were fun to talk to. Apparently, they and 60 other students where part of a Study Abroad Program who had already been here for a few weeks. This is the reason that everyone seemed to already know each other back at the barbeque.

After lunch, we learned about our class schedules. You guys back at MD have it so easy to sign up for classes. For us, we have to get permission from the teacher if we want to take their class. Then, we have to sign up for each section individually. For example, if a class has two lectures and a discussion each week, we have to sign up for each one. Sometimes lectures will be open and discussions full. So then we have to contact the teacher to get in to the discussion section. And when you are making your schedule, you can only see one class at a time. You can't see the whole schedule at once to find a place to fit a class. And if you drop a class, you have to get the student office to sign off or else you'll continue to be enrolled. Many people get F's because they thought they dropped a class.

Then we got our ID cards made. Everyone says theirs look bad. Mine looks bad. I look as if I've just been beaten up and I've been wanted for sexual offense.

That night, we were supposed to go on a cruise around the Sydney harbor. Did I tell you that every party in Australia has a theme? Well every single one has a theme. You'd think this would be my dream. But try finding an '80s outfit in your wardrobe in 2 hours, when you've only packed 2 weeks worth of clothes. Fortunately, I managed to make a Bruce Springsteen "Born in the U.S.A." costume. I was proud of myself.

I traveled by bus with the group of 60 people, and I was having fun mingling with them. And when we got to the Sydney Opera House, the weather was magnificent, and it was clear this was going to be a fun night.

Highlights of the Cruise: At nighttime, when the harbor lights up, the experience is breathtaking. I had forgotten my camera as I rushed to make the bus for the cruise, so I'll have to return for Sydney for that.

Lowlights of the Cruise: There's a reason I'm not a fan of huge parties. I feel that I can communicate and bond with people better on a personal level through talking. Talking is my comfort zone. At a party, there is loud music, heavy drinking, and a large number of people. The only way to communicate is through shouting, or physical communication.

I think we should all just accept the fact that I'm not going to be a drinker. I hate the taste of alcohol, and I fear what I'll do if I ever drink enough to lose control of my judgment. On the small cruise boat filled with 200 people, 99% were drinking, and those remaining were either pretty people getting hit on, or good friends with the drinkers. I have not known any of the people long enough to become friends with them before they all got wasted. So I opted to just enjoy the cruise and take in the sights, and block out the loud noises and cigarette smells (occassionally I was put in charge of photographer for...everyone). I tried to keep telling myself that I wasn't fitting in because I've been spending all my time with Australians, as opposed to the rest of the Americans, which is what I wanted, right? It must have become evident that I was not enjoying myself, because at one point, a guy from UMD slapped me on the back and simply said, "Buy yourself a drink and have fun," then walked away. That's when I cried.

Don't worry, no one noticed. I was leaning against the wind, facing away from the party. And it wasn't long. Just enough to make me realize how deeply I had let his words affect me. But I felt safe at the edge of the boat. I wasn't homesick. I was just a little tired of the human race for a bit. I've never felt so alone. But at the edge of the boat, when I could only see the beauty of the Harbor, I felt powerful. I felt that this image was mine. Everyone else was missing out. They didn't notice how swiftly the waves moved, or how enchanting the amusement park seemed. I was experiencing magic.

Then a girl came over and introduced herself. She said she was trying to meet everyone at the party. I knew that wasn't true, but I talked to her anyway. Another girl, from Austria, also joined our conversation. She was the only Austrian at the party, and I knew that everything I was feeling was not unique. She must have felt even more isolated, being the only one from her country. But she was making the most of it, taking pictures of everything. It was charming. Then the girls eventually went on their ways. The Austrian girl came back at one point to tell me I looked tired. I guess I was. It was 10pm, and I was ready to get off the boat.

When we all disembarked, I did not really want to go back with the people I had come with. But I didn't know my way back to the bus stop. A couple of girls from the Hawaii episode saw that I looked lost, and told me to join their group as we went to find a bus. They had a guy friend who was trying to cheer me up by saying how he used to be the non-drinker at parties, but the trick to having a good time is to just goof around and act like you've been drinking so that you fit in. He clearly missed the point.

After an hour, we finally found the bus stop. Their group took a taxi back, but I did not want to pay for another cab so I waited for the bus. Through stupid details I'd rather not get into, the bus never came for another hour and a half. Everyone left in taxis. I finally had to join the three remaining students on their taxi ride. And again, they lived at the opposite end of campus.

So I had to walk back again, just like the other night. But this time, I was without my family.

In Which John Spends a Day in Sydney and John Spends a Night in Sydney

Nothing of note happened on Monday, save for my final roommates moving in. There's Vanessa, the 3rd Aussie and Matt, an American. They are opposites.


The next day, I got to go on a tour of Sydney. It was a cheesy bus ride full of photo-ops.

See, here, I'm blocking the Sydney Opera House, because I'm more important.


As you can see, it was still cloudy and blah, so that made for a nice small tour group. However, it was full of very tired and jet lagged people, so there was not a lot of conversation or mingling. I met a girl from Norway. Whee.


(Before this trip, I was accidentally standing in line for a bus to another tour, where the people were a lot more talkative, and I probably would've bonded a lot better.)


We went to the Harbor, and Bondi Beach, and the Gap, which are big cliffs that serve as the doorway to the Harbor. Many people commit suicide off of these cliffs. What a cheery tour.


It seems as though I have more pictures from the beginning of the day than I do interesting stories, so I'll just place them into the nighttime section of the story. Don't get confused.


That evening, the 3 girls and I went back into Sydney on a pub crawl with their friends. That's the equivalent of bar-hopping, where we visit many bars in one night. Oh, the girls get very dressed up by the way, so if you're ever in Australia and plan on a night out, be fancy. Matt was no where to be found, so he didn't come.


When we arrived at the first pub, the main group was already leaving, so I don't have much to say about that one.


At the second bar, I spent most of the time talking to this redhead from Wisconsin, bonding over our Americanness. It was nice to have an extended conversation with someone who wasn't Australian for a change, so I thought that this night might be fun after all. However, this was the only bar in which we talked.


At the third bar, I ended up talking to this really nice bloke named Chris, and a group of 3 other Aussie girls. They were very nice and open, and filled with wonder about America, and gave me tips on what to do while in Australia. I didn't remember seeing these people at the bar from the other night, but I was grateful for them. However, when I mentioned who my roommates were, they had no idea who I was talking about. It turns out that the pub crawl was sponsored by their dormitory and was supposed to be a "getting to know you" field trip for freshmen. My roommates and I just crashed it. I have nothing against freshmen, but I wanted to mingle with people my own age, who were all sticking to themselves, and not interacting with the newbies.


By the time we got to the 4th bar, it was getting very late. All of the freshmen were tired and wanted to go home. I wanted to go home. My roommates wanted to go home. But we had to wait for the bus that would drive us all back to campus, which wouldn't come for another hour and a half.


Once it was time to leave, we all learned that the bus wasn't coming. That's okay, we could just use a regular bus, right? No, they all stopped running an hour ago. Fortunately, the trip sponsors arranged for a wave of taxis to pick up everyone, and the school would cover the charge.

Unfortunately, remember how I said my roommates and I crashed this event? We weren't going to get a free taxi ride. Vanessa, however, devised a plan in which we just get into a taxi, acting like we were with the dorms, and just get dropped off there and walk the rest of the way. So we did, and managed to convince the taxi driver that we lived in the dorms. It got a little scary when, in order to keep our lie valid, my drunk roommate kept on talking about how much she lives in the dorms. Not "loves living," but "lives." When we finally arrived at the dorm, the taxi driver told us that we'd have to pay for the ride, and he'd give us a receipt so that the dorm would pay us back.


So our plan was foiled. We didn't cheat the taxi system. And I had to pay for the $50 cab ride, since my roommates had no cash. Plus, we were now across campus, away from where we actually lived, so we had to walk another 15 min in the rain.


This was probably my favorite part of the night, though. My roommates and I bonded on that walk. We made the best of the rain. And I got to hear their true feelings about all of their friends and the people they met that night. They said I was one of them. I was their brother now. It's like Raincloud Village, down here.









P.S. The code word is "Penguin" if your bra is showing.

In Which Friday the 13th Disappears

After 48 hours of leaving MD, I finally arrived in Sydney. We skipped right over Friday, and came in on Valentine's Day morning. I saw Matt P. at the airport. He said, "Hey."

With the harrowing plane escapade behind me, I could look forward to settling into Australia. Rainy, rainy Australia. I missed out on my trip into the Blue Mountains, but I did get to meet two roommates, Laura and Sophie, both Australian.

Valentine's Day was mostly spent unpacking and watching Australian television with the roommates. They love American and British shows. Even Fawlty Towers! I mean, I know it's a great show, but you try finding a group of Americans who get excited over Fawlty Towers.

I skyped with Allison, which was very nice and nostalgic, while Roo checked out the room.

"We're here! ...Why don't I see any kangaroos? All I see is a tree," Roo dejectedly observed.

Don't worry. We'll see kangaroos soon. Maybe tomorrow.

"Tomorrow," however, was much rainier than the first day. I spent a majority of the day watching television with Laura. There was a reality show called "The Family." It was just about a family. The preteen son pierced his own ear. And the cat went missing. That was the plot of that episode.

An American named Oliver moved in to our apartment, took a shower, then moved out.

That night was the Village orientation barbeque. (The Village is the community where I live, right next to campus). We were supposed to mingle, but it was full of Americans who just talked to the people they knew from home. So rather than stick around, my roommates and I went to a bar to hang out with their own friends.

This was my first time in a bar, and it was interesting. As a "welcome back to campus" celebration, everyone got 3 free drinks (because, if you're in college in Australia, you're old enough to drink). Roo did not get carded. It was hard to get to know my roommates friends though, because everyone was getting loud and tipsy, so there were a few awkward moments. A point of saving grace occured when two American girls from the airplane came by and the drunkest of them started "sexy dancing" all over the place, causing the Australians to gawk and shout at the "crazy American." I just hung out with her sober friend, trying to maintain dignity for our country.

At the end, everyone got free pails.

What I learned from the night was that Australian girls are funny and witty (more so than American girls, who are drunk).

What Roo learned was how to limit himself.

In Which John Spends a Day in Hawaii

Apparently, there was some mechanical issue with the plane, resulting in an unplanned trip to Honolulu. We arrived at 6am. The next plane to Sydney wouldn't leave until 11:45pm. Since waiting at the airport was out of the question, United Airlines provided free accomodations at a hotel near Wakiki Beach and told us to have fun for the day.

"Does this mean we'll never get to Australia?" asked Roo.


Don't worry, we'll be there tomorrow. We'll miss out on all the stuff I had planned for us to do, like barbeques and hiking in the Blue Mountains. But look at where we are! This island is beautiful!

I held Roo up to the window and he looked out. The weather was beautiful. The ocean was gorgeous. The air smelled wonderful. I proposed that we go and have an adventure.

"I'd rather stay here. If it's not Australia, then I don't want to be out there."

Suit yourself.

As we checked into the hotel, I started making plans with Brooke and others from the plane about what we'd do that day. Then I saw Pierre Chang in the lobby. For those of you who don't watch Lost, you should. Mr. Chang is a character in the show who is shrouded in a lot of mystery, especially with his connections to the Dhrama Initiative and the island. Lost is filmed in Hawaii, so it was not unusual to see one of the actors at our hotel. But it was still cool.

After getting showered, I planned to find my new friends and spend a day at the beach. Unfortunately, I couldn't find them. So instead I had some breakfast, provided free from the hotel, and then went outside to go on a personal excursion. That's when I saw my friends return. They forgot to come get me when they left for the beach and now they wanted to nap. No problem, I thought. I could still enjoy the weather by myself.

When I was a block away from the hotel, it started raining. HARD. I returned to my hotel room drenched and miserable.

"Why did you go swimming with your clothes on?" asked Roo.

I ignored him and decided to fool around on the internet in the hotel room after getting changed.

After watching Lost, I decided to give my "friends" another chance. They had just woken up from their nap, just in time for lunch.

I was still full from breakfast, so agreed to join them and keep them company. They wanted to eat at a Chinese restaurant located in the hotel. The restaurant was closing their lunch service in two minutes, but they still let us in. What followed can only be described as sheer madness.

As soon as we sat down, a waitress came by with a cart with a couple of food items on it and asked which we wanted. After turning down the first item, we chose the second item and another waitress with a cart came up to me. She showed me some of her food and I tried to turn it away as a third cart arrived with more food. Five carts visited us in a span of 15 seconds. I made it out alive with only tofu in coconut milk. My friends weren't so lucky, as they had piles of dumplings and other appetizers crowding their places.

We didn't dare open up the menu.

After lunch, we strolled back down to the beach and had a loverly time sunbathing and strolling in the water.

The rest of the day was spent relaxing and getting dinner, but as Brooke often pointed out, this was not Australia. We needed to get back to where we were going.

After the sunset, the 300 of us from the plane gathered up our belongs and swapped stories of the day. Some people went whale watching, others went to Pearl Harbor, and some just slept all day.

Hawaii was a nice little detour, but Roo was getting very anxious and insisted we go to Australia.

The problem with spending a day in Hawaii was that we had to go through the whole airport process again. Almost everything was the same. Even the in-flight entertainment. Apparently Bill Murray was in some recent movie called City of Ember. I've never heard anything about this movie before, but now I've seen it twice with the sound off. Think "Stardust" meets "Alien from L.A.", Max.

Ever since Lost started, I always look at the group of people I get onto a plane with, and think about how we'd survive a crash together as a group. What factions would form? I learned today that all the old people stick with old people, all the young people stick with young people, and all the pilots would stay far away from the passengers, lest they get yelled at. Roo and Brooke both had some choice words for the pilot. Apparently "Heffalump" and "Woozle" are Hundred Acre Wood cuss words.

In Which John Does Not Arrive in Australia and Finds a Stowaway in His Luggage

As I was finishing my packing, I heard a voice squeak beside me.


"Where did I come from?" asked the baby Roo.


I knelt down beside him and explained that all kangaroos come from a place all the way on the other side of the globe called Australia. In fact, I told him, I was going there that moment, to study and appreciate the land.


"I wanna come too!" squeaked Roo.


Sorry, but you need to have a ticket if you want to go. I have to fly for almost 24 hours just to get there. It's very expensive, and sure to be a gruelling process. I'll take you when you're older.


"I'm old enough! I want to fly!"


But he was just wasting his breath. I loaded up the car, drove to the airport, and after saying goodbye to my parents at check-in, I made my way through to the gate. I sat and waited to see if I saw anyone I recognized from UMD. One person looked familiar, but it was a false identification. I decided to reach into my backpack and pull out my iPod to listen to U2: Songs About Airports.

"Uh-oh!" yelped Roo.


Roo! You aren't supposed to be here! How will I explain you to Customs?!


But the little animal couldn't take much yelling (he is a baby, after all). And so, in order to prevent a scene from occuring, I zipped the bag back up to muffle the sobs.


Okay, I whispered through the backpack, you can come, but you'll have to be very quiet. It'll be a long trip to Los Angeles and an even longer trip to Australia. So don't get cranky.


He stayed fairly quiet during the 6 hour trip to LA. I did let him out to enjoy the view. Oh, it was marvelous! We left when the sun was setting, and since we were travelling west, the sun didn't finish setting until 2 and a half hours later. The sky was a very rich rainbow for a majority of the time (I tried to get a picture, but it was hard to make it look right from the plane.) The bottom layer was the dark cloud level, then a very deep blood red, followed by a layer of orange and yellow, then that weird part where the sky tries to be green but just ends up being brown, then blue and finally the purple night.


And then the night sky! It was great when there weren't any clouds below because then the city lights from the ground couldn't be separated from the stars in the sky. If I ignored gravity, it was like we were travelling through space. That flight was magical.


Then came the flight to Australia. It was supposed to be 14 hours, and I told Roo it might get very uncomfortable if he doesn't situate himself right. Right off the bat, I noticed that people on the flight to Australia were very friendly and talkative. A lot of people my age where travelling to study abroad. I even saw one of the girls from UMD sitting a row behind me (her name's Brooke, with a K). One of the girls sitting next to me was already drunk. I talked with a nice boy who was sitting across the aisle from me. He seemed a lot like Vinnie, for those of you who know Vinnie.

"Vinnie-the-Pooh?" asked Roo, as I typed this. Kind of, I said back.


Well, right before we took off, the pilot said we'd have an hour delay. Oh well, that shouldn't be a problem. 4 hours later we took off. By this point, I could tell I had gone mad. I kept cracking up everytime I realized that the plane hadn't moved yet. I wanted to fall asleep so that we'd be in the air once I woke up, but I couldn't. I was too giddy with annoyance. Roo had already chewed through the backpack and started roaming the aisles out of boredom and frustration. I was pretty upset, because the late start meant that I'd have to miss the orientation barbeque and deal with the shuttle service from the airport informing them of my late arrival.


I've never travelled alone before,and this was starting to worry me.


But, once we were in the air, I decided whatever happens will happen, and I should stop worrying. Things were fine until 6 hours into the second flight when the pilot said "We will now begin our decent into Hawaii."


What? I squeaked.