In Which Things Pick Up

Since Cabaret, life has been nothing but Gozilla shows and assignments.

But after a week of boredom and low spirits, things picked up last night with Abby's birthday party.

We had a dance party in the theater after the show, and it mostly became a huge swing dance extravaganza. Also, since Abby had originally wanted to do a sidewalk chalk birthday party (?), my gift to her was bringing a lot of chalk and having everyone draw on the stage of the theater.

It was magical.

Afterward, she and I and a few other people went to Pancakes on the Rocks, because it can't be a great birthday without Pancakes on the Rocks.

There's not much to say, but I'm ranking last night in one of my top 10 Australia experiences.

Oh, and also, my friend Amy invited me along with her friends to go to the outback (Alice Springs). So the week after Dr. Horrible, I'll be on a road trip with them. That should be fun.

In Which MacMS Parties Are Just as Bad as DraMac Parties

Once more, the week has been filled with procrastination, rehearsals, and Cabaret shows.

Highlight of my week? Season finale of Lost, which was brilliant and made me feel good to be alive.

But this post isn't about that.

For the past few weeks, I've been filled with nothing but fear for the future. Once I get back to America, I don't have anything lined up. I don't know if I'll have a job. I don't know what I want to do after my senior year of college. Everyone I meet has their life figured out. It's scary. I just keep myself busy with plays and assignments to not focus on the long-term goals.

Tonight was the final night of Cabaret, and of course, a cast party was sure to follow. Abby and Andrew left it immediately, opting to watch a movie instead. I wanted to stay at the party because I thought I'd at least stand a chance this time.

I suck at parties. I've yet to make myself succeed. The drinking thing is always an issue, but I know the technique is to just have a good time with the people anyway. Except a lot of activities center around drinking or being drunk. I like talking to people, I do. But when I've spent the entire run of the show moping around, mostly talking with Abby and Andrew, I'm not going to start winning people over at a party. As I've said before, I've had a weird position in the play as "the guy who played all the minor roles." I wasn't a lead, I wasn't a dancer, and I wasn't in the band. I felt out of place throughout the entire run of the show.

I did connect with a few people, such as those I'd worked with previously, other Americans, and the few girls who originally shared my position. But at parties, I only feel comfortable around those I'm really close with. And they left.

After observing all of the drinking games (which eventually turned into all of the girls making out with each other and the lead guy "since there were no other guys at the party"), I decided to leave.

And I really think I blew a lot of chances tonight, since I don't know what I want, or don't know how to get what I want.

Sorry if this is incoherent. I'm very tired and not looking forward to the busy week ahead of me. Maybe tomorrow I'll be able to fix things.

In Which Life is a Cabaret

This past week hasn't been too exciting, hence the lack of updates.

Everyday was spent with me waiting for Cabaret rehearsal to roll around.

Every Cabaret rehearsal was spent with me waiting for it to be over.

I saw Star Trek the day it came out. It was good to see a movie to break up the funk I was in. Having not seen any Star Trek thing ever, I really liked the movie. Made me want to check out the original series.

The opening night of Cabaret was Friday. We had just gotten our pit band together, so it was a pretty rough run. However, that just inspired the cast to be amazing for Saturday night.

Friday was also Taylor's actual birthday. Actual birthdays are always nice.

On Saturday, we did some filming for another play I'm going to be in. I ran around a playground in a toga. At one point I got stuck. It hurt.

My internet's been really slow lately, hindering my communication with people immensely.

Hopefully I'll have more exciting stories in the future.

In Which John Gives Thumbs Up to a Stripper

Haven't updated since New Zealand, but here is basically what life has been like since then up until this epic weekend:

- Establishing the Thrill Seekers as a permanent group
- Not doing any homework due to due dates getting pushed back all the time
- Rehearsing for Cabaret
- Hanging out with the Moon Child and Blade
- Preparing for Sister Nightmare's birthday

Alright, this weekend!

On Friday, the casts of "The Dirty" and "Johnny the Sperm's Adventure in the Vajayjay" were taken to Kings Cross for a cast bonding experience. For details about the title of this blog please ask me.

On Saturday, we had to get up early, for the Thrill Seekers were going to the Blue Mountains. Or Blue Hash Browntains, since we ate hash browns for breakfast.

This was all part of Taylor's surprise 21st birthday. She was upset since her birthday is next week and that's when Cabaret opens, so we planned her a special, tiring day.

After seeing beautiful scenery and hiking for hours, we returned home for a nap while Abby and Andrew went to rehearsal. Taylor and I then saw "The Boat That Rocked." I thought it was a pretty swell movie.

Then Taylor and I returned to her place where SURPRISE! Everyone was waiting. I have never been on the "distraction committee" for a surprise party, but it was great fun spending the day with Taylor to ensure she had a great 21st.

Her roommates made two cakes, since the first one failed. I loved it. Imagine funfetti brownies. No one else liked it though, so I took the rest home.

Today I had Cabaret rehearsal all day. I'm excited to be the random guy onstage for the entire show.

In Which New Zealand Happens

Saturday: I spent the day packing and travelling to the airport. I watched "Yes Man" on the plane. The book was much, much better. Go read it.

When I arrived in NZ, it was late at night, and I had to check into a hostel. I'd never been to a hostel before, and I was kind of scared. First, because I noticed that there was already someone sleeping in my room. Next, because there were 4 other people sleeping as well.


Sunday: I woke up and met my roommates, and was relieved to find that they were also on my trip. There were 49 of us in total on the trip. Most were from Macquarie, and the group I initially spent time with were from all over the globe. There were Americans, Australians, Germans, Danes, Colombians, a Mexican, and a Brit.


At lunch, we went to these rocky hills where scenes from Narnia were filmed, including Aslan's death and resurrection. So, since it was Easter, it made sense for us to be there.














Afterward, we traveled to a farm in Flock Hill, and learned about sheep and wool. We had some time to kill before dinner, so we all planned to travel to a "nearby" waterfall. We followed the signs, but it lead to a dead end with a huge mud puddle. Some gave up and went back, while others decided to try different paths. After two hours, my travelling companions had all given up. The rest were on bikes, so they went back without me, leaving me to find my way back home.

2 more hours later, I finally found my way back. The sun had set during this time, and everything was pitch black. I had my iPod to illuminate the way. I tried using short cuts, but this actually added time to my journey. And one point I ran into a field of cows.

I used these two hours to reflect on life, like one does during a walkabout. The sky was absolutely beautiful. You could see so many stars.

(Turns out the waterfall was actually beyond the mud puddle from earlier, but the recent snow meltage had caused the huge pond to appear in the middle of the path.)

Monday: Oh, this was Glacier Day. We climbed 5000 steps...or 500 steps...up a rainforesty mountainside to walk onto a glacier. I ate a piece of it. This was a very sweaty, tiring, 4 hour process.

Tuesday: During the day, I finally found my waterfall. It was beautiful, but the best part was the afternoon/evening, where we arrived in Queenstown and traveled up the mountain side to race in luge karts and bungee jump. The only people who did this were about 10 of us, including my roommates and their friends. This was a lot of fun, and bungee jumping is one of the greatest experiences I've ever had.

We ate that night at a Mexican restaurant called Sombreros where we all wore sombreros (except for the Mexican, who didn't want to perpetuate stereotypes). The food was amazing though, and even the Mexican agreed that it was like real Mexican food.

Wednesday: My second activity for Queenstown involved a horseback ride around some of the locations used in Lord of the Rings on some of the horses used in Lord of the Rings. It was rainy, and the horses were hard to handle at first, but it was still wonderous to look at.

We ate dinner at Fergburger, which has the best burgers ever, and we should eat there again tomorrow.

At night, the plan was for us all to meet up at a bar and then visit a nearby "ice bar" where everything is made of ice, and you get to spend 30 min in there (since it's small, and othere people want to get in). As you know, I have sworn off bars entirely, and since I wasn't really bonding with the people on my trip (i.e. they all got wasted before we even left for the bar), I knew I'd be miserable. I still came along for the ice bar, because that was something unique.

Since we had a big group, we went in two halves. My drunk roommates told me to wait for them and go in the second group, but instead I went in the first group, and it was the best decision I made the whole trip.

I barely knew any of the people in the first group, and I was basically just counting down the 30 min I had to spend in the ice bar. Suddenly, a girl came out of nowhere and started taking pictures with me and her friend. We got to talking, and we basically stayed together for the rest of the night.

Even after the ice bar, we didn't go out to various bars to get drunk like everyone else did. We went on a quest to find brownies. We never found them, but I was glad I had finally made real friends on the trip. (For the rest of the trip, the girl and never got drunk on the nights everyone else did, even though she does drink.)

Thursday: As we said goodbye to Queenstown, we were greeted with a magnificent rainbow that stretched across the sky. I wasn't able to get great pictures of it, but at one point it framed a mountain perfectly, and it was the best thing I'd ever seen.

We spent that night on a cruise boat in a fjord. The quarters were very cramped, and the cruise was quite cold, but that didn't stop us from swimming in the water. I even managed to do a lap around the boat in freezing water, although I barely made it.

That night, the girls and I played various board games, including Guess Who, except instead of asking the regular questions ("Is your person wearing a hat?"), we asked abstract questions ("Is your person a pedophile?").

Friday: We spent the morning cruising around the fjord, and getting a spectacular sunrise over the ocean. At lunch, I had a peppermint slice, the greatest dessert ever. Imagine aYork Peppermint Patty and a brownie had a baby. We then drove a lot, stopped at a fruit stand, with delicious fruit products and beautiful roses. We ended the day at another out of the way place near a lake.

I skipped a stone.

I got my future read by one of the fellow tour members who had tarot cards. I'm either supposed to "stay the course" or "make a change in my life," I forget which.

The girls and I explored the area, playing on a seesaw and playing ping pong. Everyone eventually ended up in the hot tubs.

Saturday: Most of the day was spent driving back to Chrsitchurch and the scary hostel (where the trip began). Nothing truly exciting happened. The tour bus left us, and my new friends and I just wandered around the city.

Sunday: I said goodbye to my new friends, and eventually caught a plane back home. This time, I watched "Bolt." I'm pretty sure everyone sitting around me thought I was weird for a) choosing to watch Bolt out of the huge library and b) crying during the emotional parts. I think it made me miss my dog.

And that was my trip. What have we learned?

In Which John Has a Pretty Sweet Week

Monday: After auditioning for the Godzilla plays, Abby, Andrew and I lied in the field and watched the clouds, then the sunset, then the stars. Abby said it was the perfect moment, and if she were to die right then, she'd be satisfied.

Tuesday: I got into one of the plays which is about a sperm's adventure. I play the Narrator. I convinced the director to let me play it as Eros, god of love, lust, and sex, rather than the boring professor-type she had written. I'm just trying to make it so I have a costume similar to Pit from Super Smash Bros. Brawl.

Wednesday: I participated in an improv competition among three Sydney universities. Australians have a lot of different improv games than Americans. We didn't win, but everyone (the audience, the other competetors, and the judges) loved my serious, realistic scene about a marriage proposal that never occurs.

Thursday: I watched Twlight with the Thrill Seekers. Not every day can be great.

Friday: I visited Allie and Amy's home to eat Passover dinner. It was absoultely amazing, and I wish I could have stayed longer, but I have to get ready for New Zealand tomorrow.

So, I'll catch up with you guys in 10 days.

In Which John Has More Birthdays Which Make for the Best Weekend Ever

The week was just spent doing stuff and things and shopping at malls and stuff.

On Friday, Taylor and I got ready for a birthday party. It was Disney-On-Ice themed, so we had to dress up as Disney characters, and then go ice skating. I went as Lumiere and Taylor went as Babette the feather duster from Beauty and the Beast (Abby was originally supposed to go as Babette, but homework came up). Our costumes were pretty good, and the fact that we came as a pair helped with the awesometicity.

This was the first time I've been ice skating since kindergarten, so I was really shaky at first. But I eventually I learned to stray from the wall and skate without looking at my feet. I only fell down when we started a chain of skaters and it got a little hectic.

Afterward, we went to a Japanese karaoke bar. This was amazing. We got our own room where we could sing as loud as we wanted to. The songs were pop songs, but the videos that played were generic Japanese music videos that were either live dance performances or tragic love stories or racing car video games. I was the first person to get a schor of over 90 points with "Girls Just Want to Have Fun," but the best part of the evening was right at the very end where the birthday girl (and everyone else) sang "Under the Sea" and we got a perfect 100.

Saturday was going to be a big day. We had plans to go to the Glebe Markets, eat at Pancakes on the Rocks, and spend a night at Luna Park. It was supposed to be a huge event with the whole theater dept, but only me, Abby, Andrew, Taylor and two other theater members came. At Glebe, we ate in a cafe, and suddenly Taylor proposed we sing a song. We're theater people, so there is nothing unusual about that request. But then she started counting down for us to start singing, and I realized we hadn't picked the song yet, so I thought we were just supposed to "know" what we were going to sing. As it turns out, the other 5 already picked the song. It was Happy Birthday.

The day turned into my belated 21st birthday celebration. I had expected that we might do something like this, but I didn't expect it for today. So I was surprised. It was my first surprise party. I've always wanted one.

We shopped around in Glebe for a bit, and I ate some of the best candy ever. It was called licorice, but they were sour fruit flavors, softer, and very long strings.

We then walked all the way to Pancakes on the Rocks, which I've heard plenty about, but was expecting an IHOP type place. Pancakes were involved in almost every menu item. There were the desserty pancakes as well as dinner crepes and meals. I got Potato Pancakes, expecting latkes. Instead, I got buttermilk pancakes with potatos and spices...inside the batter. They were glorious.

At this point, the other two theater members left, and there were just four of us. We had to walk to Luna Park which was on the other side of the Sydney Harbor. Thus began the most magical evening ever.

The four of us walked along the Harbor Bridge. The view was spectacular. We made a pact to return to the center of the bridge every 10 years. I hope we stick to that.

On the other side of the bridge, we became a crew. We got new names. Andrew was "Blade," Abby was "The Moonchild," and Taylor was "Sister Nightmare." I have reasons for picking all these names, each of which relate to something from back home. I was dubbed "Professor Lightning." Together, we became "The Thrill Seekers."

Luna Park was magical. I acted like a little kid the whole time. We rode on various spinning rides and ate ice cream and failed at carnival games and explored the Coney Island Funhouse. And even though the Ferris Wheel closed before we could ride on it, we did sit on the harbor and watch the boats go by. It was just perfect.

(My camera stopped working, so all of the pictures from Luna Park are in Taylor's albums. Friend her and enjoy. There are so many I wish were my profile pic.)

We then went back to Abby and Taylor's for Funfetti cake with cream cheese icing. And we watched "Reefer Madness: The Musical."

And I loved my friends and appreciate everything they did.

In Which John Eats a Kangaroo and Role-Plays

Yesterday was a most magical day. Team America spent the afternoon and evening around Sydney, culminating in a dinner at Darling Harbo(u)r. There, I ate kangaroo. And it was delicious.

"What?!" perked up baby Roo, paws covered with chocolate from Tim Tams. "You found a kangaroo and you ate it?!"

Um, no, it was just called kangaroo.

"Okay, you had me worried for a bit there."

*phew*

On the ride home, I realized that I was experiencing one of the most perfect moments of my life.

There was this commercial from a few years back in which four young friends, having just completed a day of fun, rest on a train ride back home at night. They are filled with excitement from their adventure, but they are all exhausted, so they just rest and smile in peaceful bliss. I've always wanted that to happen in real life. And it did last night, with just the four of us. Everyone was satsified with the day. I happened to be listening to Sufjan Stevens at the time. It was a perfect moment.

That night, I listened to a rock cover of Zombie. That song is perfect in any form.

Today, I got my New Zealand travel package ready, with airline tickets and everything. It's hard to believe that "Spring" Break is coming so soon. I've barely done anything for my classes yet.

Tonight, I did something I never thought I'd do: I played Dungeons and Dragons. It was actually a fan-made game loosely based on the rules of Dungeons and Dragons, but it was role-playing nonetheless. The theater group here is really big on the game. We started a new game tonight, and it will last the semester. It was difficult to get started, but after a while, I began to have fun.

It was a lot like creating an epic movie on the spot. Everyone has their character and the gamemaster decides what happens in the plot, but you are free to react in any way. There were 8 players plus the gamemaster.

Our story was set in a sci-fi space world. Our characters started on a planet that was about to be hit by 8 meteors. Most of the spaceships had left the planet evacuating citizens or trying to destroy the asteriods. By the end, there was one egotistical diplomat who managed to get his pilot and medic onto an evacuation ship and do with it as he pleased, ignoring the civilians on board. A smarmy crime boss and a rogue psychic eventually snuck onto a military vessel, after receiving a lot of flack from the Gamemaster. I was an orphaned soldier (like the Artful Dodger, if he were drafted) who happened to get into the personal ship of a Jar-Jar like pilot and his engineer, and we took out two of the asteroids (although the diplomat took all the credit). Two other asteroids were destroyed by other ships, two crashed into major cities and one crashed into the ocean, resulting in a tsunami...wait, that only makes for 7 asteroids. The Gamemaster messed up somewhere.

In Which John Meets Two Amazing Girls

Allie and Amy arrived in the afternoon. They were just as awesome as I had expected them to be. I showed them around the mall and campus and even though we didn't get to go ice skating, it was still very enjoyable. We lounged in the grass and played in the playground (which is much cooler than any American playground). They got to meet Australians, which was a little more scary than they were expecting.

I had to go get ready for the Friday night show, and they came beforehand to bring me dinner and flowers. This was the first time anyone had brought me flowers for being in a show.

They really enjoyed the show and were shocked by the twist. Afterward, I walked them to the bus stop and bid them farewell. Is it possible to have favorite people that you've only seen for less than a day?

On Saturday, we had two shows. The matinee performance was very blah, but after the show, one of the girls who also pitched a script the other day (which also didn't get in) proposed an idea where she and I go through Dramac and run our shows separately from the department during a period when the theater was free. It sounded like a good idea (seeing as how her play was another really good one that didn't make it in), so we exchanged information.

The final show was a lot better than the day. My director encouraged improvisation, so I improvized the hell out of the play. It was a lot of fun.

At the cast party, we ate an ice cream cake.

In Which John's Day Goes From Wonderful to Terrible In 10 Easy Steps

10) After the past few days of excitement and intrigue at various malls, I woke up bright and early (for me, anyway) to meet with Abby and print out our scripts. We were going to pitch them after class for the upcoming short play revue.

9) Abby was having a down day, but I (hopefully) helped raise her spirits. I moved to Tier 1.

8) In ABST, neither Abby or I had done the reading, but at least I correctly identified the aboriginal painting as that of a white settler.

7) We pitched our plays. I could've been more energetic in my pitching, but I was one of the first ones to go, so I wasn't exactly sure how to sell it.

6) Abby's play got in, mine didn't. I worked for weeks on that play. I know other people did too, but still, I felt it would be the one thing I might actually get to succeed in accomplishing while here in Australia. At this point our days switched (hers went from bad to good, mine from good to bad).

5) I left the theater to go prepare the security guards for the arrival of my friends from off campus who would be coming to see the show tonight. (During some point, my leaving of the theater caused me to miss out on the fun of the theater's new ambulance.)

4) I went on Facebook and the first status update I saw was about the big twist at the end of last night's Lost which I was just about to watch.

3) I received a call from my off-campus friends saying they wouldn't be able to visit me tonight.

2) I was completely drained emotionally and had no desire to do the show, but I did it anyway. Hopefully no one noticed. (During some point, people threw away my dinner and drink that I had put in the theater fridge, so I was tired from hunger as well.)

1) After the show let out, I hoped to see my friends from on campus, who had also told me they'd be coming tonight. No one showed. Everyone else's friends came and went to hang out with them at U-Bar. I decided today was bad enough to not get U-Bar involved.

I picked the worst/best day to wear my "it sucks to be me" shirt.

In Which Eeyore Finds the Wolery

During a very blustery storm, Owl's house crashes to the ground. Eeyore takes it upon himself to find a new house for Owl. After searching and searching, he finds a house. He leads everyone to a house that is very familiar.

A house that has a sign outside saying "TRESPASSERS WILL" which we all know is short for "Tresspassers William," Piglet's ancestor.

Eeyore turns to the group and asks, don't they agree? Is this not just the house for Owl to live in?

"And then Piglet did a Noble Thing...
"Yes, it's just the house for Owl," he said grandly. "And I hope he'll be very happy in it." And then he gulped twice, because he had been very happy in it himself." - A.A. Milne

In Which John Goes to the Beach and Everyone Has a Great Day

Who cares about what happened on Wednesday and Thursday? This story is about Friday, baby!

I woke up bright and early to get fully ready for the day at the beach. The sky was completely overcast.

But then it went away! There was absolutely no reason for that part of the story.

6 of us left campus at 11:00 for Avalon Beach. It's a nice small beach that was not very populated, considering it was a Friday during school hours.

We started with a small "breakfast" at a bakery where they have sweet bread and Australian Andrew insisted that "frosting" was a weird word and should be called "icing."

We had to coax our friend who was deathly afraid of fish to go into the water past her ankles. After we succeeded, we did everything that makes the beach fun (like you see in movies):

- Body surfing
- Girls getting on guys shoulders and playing "Chicken"
- Playing catch in the ocean
- Building a sand castle
- Burying someone in the sand
- Reading on the beach (in this case it was a dramatic reading of Twilight)
- Making...uh, sand angels?
- Getting sunburnt
- Spinning high-fives in the water...we made it a thing

After the ocean portion of the beach trip was over, it was time to head to a NINJA-THEMED RESTAURANT for lunch. Unfortunately, they were closed a half-hour before the sign said they'd close, so we just sat at the table where there were presumably many ninjas around.

So instead we ate at a seafood place that was recommended by a "friend." We got the seafood platter (fish, calamari, scallops, chips (fries), and prawns (shrimp)). This was actually just five varieties of "chewy, flavorless, white stuff deep fried in a thick layer of batter." We probably each had 3 heart attacks during that meal.

Then we decided to be healthy and got gelato. Mine was nougat flavored. It was interesting, but the Peach-Mango-Cheesecake was probably the wiser choice.

We headed home after that. Australians love to say "fail" and "win." Remember when that was popular in America? ...Yeah.

At home, I got to manage the house for yet another performance of the musical. It was a lot of fun, and I found myself being less bored at this one than I did the first time, even though very few cast members hung out in the lobby this time.

And now I'm looking forward to this epic weekend to continue with the cast party, which is sure to end in great memories and huge regrets.

In Which John Wears Green

I mailed the Sisterhood book today. It was a lot less stressful than originally thought.

Places I Want to Go: The Safe House in M'wakee. It's a spy-themed restaurant. It sounds like a Disneyland attraction.

It has been decided that something must be done about boring lectures.

Adverb Update: Having skipped the previous night's lecture, I was unsure whether another adverb incident would crop up in the discussion. But have no fear, we once again went over what an adverb was for the 6th (and it appears final) time.

After class, I had Dr. Horrible rehearsal. Everyone already knew all of the songs by heart, but I'd only seen the show once, so a lot of it struck me as new and funny, though it was a bit embarrassing when it came time for me to sing and I didn't know my words.

Afterwards it was dark, so I walked my friend Taylor back to her apartment. She is also American. There, she invited me in and a hung out with her and Abby for the rest of the night. We went grocery shopping and I finally got to try the other Australian delicacy: Tim Tams. They are the opposite of Vegemite. They are chocolate sandwich cookies with chocolate filling and covered in chocolate. I'd bring some back with me, but I'll probably eat them all first.

When we returned from shopping, we just hung around and Facebook chatted with multiple people. It sounds boring, but was actually a lot of fun. Since I'm in Dr. Horrible with Taylor, and in Cabaret with Abby, I'm sure tonight marked the beginning of an American comraderie, with many Tim Tams in the months to come.

In Which John Turns In a Paper

Turning in a paper is quite an ordeal when you don't have a printer. To do it properly, you must follow these steps:

1) Put your assignment on a flash drive

2) Walk from your apartment to the library

3) Ask the library information desk how to print a paper

4) Walk from the library to the student services building

5) Learn that your student ID counts as a printing card

6) Walk back to the library

7) Put money on your ID card to cover the cost of printing

8) Walk back to the student services building

9) Ask where you are actually supposed to go to print

10) Go to one of the computer labs

11) Sit at an empty computer

12) Insert your flash drive

13) Open up your assignment and press "Print"

14) Wait for the printer to print, notice nothing happening, and hit "Print" again

15) Try a different computer

16) Try a different computer lab

17) Get in line behind a bunch of people printing documents and observe what their doing

18) Realize that they somehow got their documents on the adjacent computer without the aid of a flash drive

19) Ask the only other student in the room that you personally know how to print

20) Insert the flash drive into their computer, open the file, press print, then go over to the computer near the printer, find your document on the screen, swipe your ID card, and print the paper

21) Leave to turn in your paper

22) Return to pick up the flash drive that you left in your friend's computer

23) Walk to the building with the Linguistics office

24) Take the elevator to the 5th floor, riding with your Linguistics teacher who does not acknowledge you on the whole ride, despite holding your assignment where she can see it

25) Search for room 508 (Hint: It's the poorly marked door near rooms 566 and 593)

26) Fill out an extensive form describing who you are and what class this assignment is for

27) Realize you don't remember the name of your tutor

28) Finally find the tutor's name written in your journal, write it on the form

29) Staple the form to your paper

30) Insert the paper into the assignment box

See? It only takes 30 easy steps to successfully turn in a paper.

After that fun day, I eventually found myself at the part of the day I looked forward to and equally dreaded: The Cabaret rehearsal. I finally would learn if I was in the cast or not. Turns out I was, and I did not have to go home in shame. It also turns out that there is a cast of about 30. There are five guys, four of which are leads. I am the only male chorus member at the moment. That might be fun.

After rehearsal, my American friend Abby and I planned the first of "Things John Wants to Do In Australia." This Friday we have organized a beach trip, since we've yet to go to the beach and we have to go while the weather is still warm. I finally feel like I'm going to start enjoying the Australia part of Australia.

In Which John Gets a Behind-the-Scenes Look at the Theater Program

On Friday night, I watched a really crappy 80's horror movie on Aussie TV called "The Cold" (although IMDB calls it "The Game"). This movie is begging for an MST3K'ing. We should find this movie and riff it when I come back to America.

On Saturday, I "rehearsed" for the upcoming play. It was very informal, and not all of the actors were there, so hopefully future rehearsals will be more productive.

Afterward, I stayed at the theater so I could help manage the candy booth during the musical. I burned my hand with the hot water machine. That's it. I was basically in the lobby during the whole show, but fortunately the cast uses the lobby as a backstage area, so I was not bored.

I really learned a lot about the dynamics of this group of people. When I first met everyone at the welcome picnic, they all seemed like a close family. And I suppose they still are. But as with every group, there is always talking behind the backs of others. That night I learned who the socially awkward members are, who is jealous of who, and, conversely, who the nicest people are. I had seen most of these people only at during the show, so learning that they aren't like their characters was quite a shock. For example, one of the main domineering villains is actually a meek, quiet person.

Once the show was over, the cast stuck around because they had to come in the next day for filming all day (a lot of Australians commute to campus, so it made sense to sleep over in the theater). I stuck around for the huge dance session, where the pit band just continued playing songs. Then, we were preparing to watch a movie, but we got caught up in one guys never-ending guitar jam/storytelling session. It was made up on the spot, and I was surprised that he managed to hold our attention for over an hour.

Then, I decided to go home, and in some weird twist of fate, I ended up having an epic online conversation with some girl that I had never met. See, I still keep in touch with Allison, and her friend from school is also studying abroad in Australia. I haven't met her friend face to face, but we've been keeping in touch during our time in Australia. Then last night, her roommate was using her computer, so when I started talking, she just kept the conversation going. Turns out neither of us like to end conversations. So we got really deep and philosophical about our life views. That was a weird once-in-a-lifetime experience. We're probably going to get married.

Today, after a lot of procrastination, I finally did my first two homework assignments. Everyone here loves using Blackboard. I was having trouble keeping track of everything, and had no luck finding the actual rules for one of the assignments. I ended up posting something that I'm sure is viewable by my whole class as opposed to just the teacher.

Since the DDK cast was filming all day, I decided to stop by the theater and see how things were going. I'm not sure exactly what they all think of me at the moment, seeing as how I'm always around yet not involved in the show. But fortuantely, I've made enough friends to justify my existance.

While there, I heard that the first Cabaret rehearsal was on Monday night. Again, I've heard from multiple sources that I am in the cast, but nothing official yet. I didn't not receive notice about this rehearsal. It conflicts with my LING lecture, and originally I was going to go to class because I had told my other play's director that I would not be free for that play's rehearsal due to class. But, Cabaret weighs more importantly than the other play in my mind. And it definitely weighs more than LING lecture, which should just be called "What An Adverb Is 101." I can afford to miss one lecture, right?

In Which John Does Some Things for a Few Days

Things I have done in the past few days:

- Written a short play that combines elements of The Little Prince and Calvin and Hobbes

- Purchased a cell phone

- Eaten at the Australian version of Chipotle (Mad Mex, it doesn't come close to the majesty of Chipotle)

- Sworn to never go to a bar ever again (the excursions always end poorly)

Wow, that's not at all much. I need to remedy this situation.

In Which John Does Not Watch "Watchmen" Again

My Linguistics class has started to take its toll on me. I've become snarky with the fellow students, who fortunately haven't noticed yet.

Number of Linguistics Class Periods I've Had: 5
Number of Linguistics Class Periods We've Gone Over What An Adverb Is: 5

3 times was funny. 4 times was scary. 5 times means the end is near.

In audition news, I was told that I got the role of the newscaster in Dr. Horrible. So, considering the number of people who auditioned for the 12-person cast, I'm pretty lucky just to be a part of it. I also heard through the grapevine that I'll be in the chorus for Cabaret. Since I had not heard this officially yet, my conclusion is that I was second in line for one of the main parts, but one guy had to choose between a lead in Cabaret and Dr. Horrible. He chose Cabaret today. I wish he chose Dr. Horrible just so I could see if my prediction was right.

After the improv workshop, a bunch of theater people were going to see the Watchmen. I had already seen it, but I tagged along for the journey to the shopping center so I could get dinner. When the movie was about to start, I went to leave, and my friend asked why. Earlier in the day, I had pulled a similar act, when I joined her and her friends in between classes to kill time, then left right before they went to the mall. So, as a joking reference to the earlier time, I said "I live for the journey, not the destination."

Although I was joking, I started thinking about what I said. I find that I do really enjoy the journeys of life, rather than the end results. Whether they be literal (such as car trips and plane rides) or not, I love the space in between action. This is when I usually can listen to music and think about...everything. I love walking to class. I love rehearsing for shows. I even love the pursuit of romance, having a crush. I usually live in this constant state of waiting for things to happen, so I've learned to embrace it, and actually find comfort in it. When you focus on the moment, you find so many small details that you would often overlook. People often asked me if I was excited to go to Australia. No, I was not. I knew it would happen. I was more excited to live during the days leading up to it. Just as I was excited to not watch Watchmen again.

Instead I sat in a huge empty field and watched the sky.

Did you know that the moon in Australia has the same face as in America but is rotated 90 degrees to the left?

In Which John Goes to Mardi Gras

Friday - I watched the Dark Knight for the second time as a part of FilmSoc. Since I'd already seen it once, I just decided that I'd stay until I got bored and then leave. But I never got bored. I liked it just as much as I did the first time. Why was this not nominated for Best Picture?

I also found out that I got the role of the villain in the upcoming play. So, woo!

Saturday - My roommates and I went to Australian Mardi Gras. Unlike actual Mardi Gras, this was held on a Saturday, and was essentially a glorified gay pride parade. I had never been to a gay pride parade before, but I'm not a big fan of crowds, nor parades for that matter. And whereas Mardi Gras invokes images of everyone drunk and dancing amongst the parade, everyone was just drunk and standing tightly packed to the side to watch the parade. I got very sore from standing in the same spot for 4 hours straight.

Afterwards, as we were leaving to catch a bus back to campus, some small fight broke out across the street. As people ran across the street to observe, I noticed that a bus was driving around the corner at full speed, just as two people ran right in front of it. I had never witnessed anyone coming so close to injury before in my life, so my body involuntarily shouted "Watch out!" as if that would do any good. Even if they had heard me, they would've stopped and turned around and gotten hit anyway. Fortunately, the bus stopped in time, with neither of the people any the wiser that their lives almost ended.

My heart was in my throat the rest of the night.

Sunday - I had a read through of the script for the play. There's a girl who also made it in the cast and plays the female villain. We auditioned together, and she was the first person who made me feel comfortable acting in this new land, so I'm glad she also made it. Everything is big and over-the-top (it's written that way). I get an eyepatch.

Sorry there isn't as much interesting stuff going on quite yet.

In Which John is Entertained

So, the other night, I saw "A Dark Day's Knight" which is a musical based on the world of Star Wars. It was produced and written by students here. The story is basically a tragic love story between a young Jedi sent to investigate the murder of a Galactic Counsel member and a worker girl at a brothel. All of the songs are actually popular songs with new lyrics based on the story. This included parodies of Bohemian Like You, Come As You Are, and Killing Me Softly With His Song. It was pretty fun.

Of course there were impressive lightsaber battles, for what Star Wars musical wouldn't have them? I really enjoyed the story because it wasn't trying to weasel it's way into the pre-existing Star Wars canon, but rather happened to be set in the Star Wars era, like a medieval play or a western. The story came first and the Star Wars came second.

The next day I went to a couple classes, then remembered that Watchmen came out that day, so I went to see it. It was the middle of a school day, so the theater was virtually empty, although there was a guy dressed as Captain Jack Sparrow (according to the woman at the concession stand, this guy comes to every "nerdy fan movie" dressed as Sparrow).

I thought the movie was an overall success. I hadn't read the story in a long time, so it was nice to be familiar with the plot and still be effected emotionally by the twists and turns. I had gone in knowing that the ending had been altered from the story, but I didn't really remember the original ending, so when I checked it later, I was surprised at how the new ending fit in a lot better to the themes and emotions of the story. There were a few hokey moments that could've been tweaked (especially at the very end) and Nixon was a bit laughable. But I was pleased with the movie, and I think it did a very good job.

Afterwards, I had dinner with a few of the guys from the DDK cast. They are cool folk. One of them let me know that I got into the upcoming short play revue, but he didn't tell me which one (although apparently the directors were fighting over who got me for their play).

That night I went to the University Bar to celebrate my roommate Matt's birthday, but it was not as fun as last week, so I left early and chose to sit in a tree and admire the stars, which was much more beautiful.

In Which John Has Two Birthdays and Gets a Present

At midnight, my roommates and I were in the middle of bonding. We'd take turns asking questions and sharing stories. Vanessa (or "Ness," since Australians shorten everything) does not know what animal represents her. She was thus shamed from the discussion.

Before I went to bed, I noticed that my parents had wished me a Happy Birthday at Australian midnight.

Then came the actual day itself.

I was looking forward to the day, even though I knew it'd be long. After lunch, I had my first class, a 2-hour lecture about the First Australians. Of course it was boring, but at least I know someone in the class now, which always seems to make classes better.

Afterwards, I had to go straight to my next class about Australian Media for another hour. It was fine, we watched some Australian commercials, but I was anxious to get through the class because up next was...

Improv! I found the improv group, and finally got to feel at home, if only for 45 min. But since I had another class to go to, I could only stay for the warm-up portion and had to miss out on playing games.

Up next was my English discussion. Everyone in my section is majoring in Early Education. Everyone struggled with basic grammar. It seems so weird having grown up with this stuff in school, that you don't realize not everyone had the same upbringing as you. Still, I can sense that I'll go crazy when I'm 2 months in and people still haven't grasped the difference between an adverb and an adjective.

Afterwards I had to go to yet another audition. The day before I had done the dancing audition for Cabaret and today I had to do the singing portion. I think it went well. I had to do an American accent. I nailed it. I also had to do a German accent. I tried to imitate Beicken, but I ended up sounding more like my Polish Joke character. Oh well. We'll see what happens with that soon.

By this point, I was feeling a little bummed. It feels weird having gone most of your birthday without seeing anyone who knows you and can wish you a Happy Birthday. But fortunately, my roommates are my family, and they had ordered many pizzas for dinner. A couple of my roommates' friends came over. I don't know whether I can definitively call them my friends yet, even though I've seen them a lot. There's Adelle (the attractive, funny one), Sophie (the attractive, funny one), and Steff (the attractive, funny one...hmm, maybe all Aussie girls are the attractive, funny one). They made me a birthday card out of construction paper. It says "Have a whale of a time..." and there's a cutout of a whale. (I said it was a fish, because it's tail was vertical instead of horizontal, but Adelle pointed out that it had a blowhole, so she was right.)

For some reason, I really like this card, probably more than I should. If you haven't noticed, the title of this post (as well as all the others) is based on the way the chapters are titled in old novels, especially Winnie-the-Pooh. In the chapter "In Which Eeyore Has a Birthday and Gets Two Presents," Eeyore informs Pooh that it is his birthday, and Pooh tells Piglet, so they both decide to get him gifts. Pooh likes honey, so he thinks a pot of honey will be a good gift. But, being Pooh, he eats all the honey and is left with an empty jar. So he decides that should be the gift. Piglet gets an old balloon that he has leftover from his own birthday, put it pops before he reaches Eeyore. Nevertheless, Eeyore accepts both gifts (he uses the jar to store the popped balloon) and treasures them. I'm going to treasure this card.

After pizza, we had white chocolate cake. I'm not a fan of cake, but I loved this cake. Australian cake is better than your cake. My roommates put 21 sparklers on the cake. They went out before I had a chance to make a wish. The smoke alarm went off.

Then we watched a bunch of YouTube videos.

So that was my first 21st birthday.

Around this time, slow Americans started realizing it was my birthday, so I spent most of today reading Facebook birthday messages. It's always funny to see who leaves you those. Sometimes it's people you haven't spoken to in years or just don't really know who write only "happy birthday." No thought or effort, you kind of wonder why they bother. Sometimes you get people who try to start conversations, "Happy Birthday, tell me all about Australia!" I'm sorry, but you should've asked for that before I had to wade through this sea of wall posts. I like the ones with a little flair, or, if you're like Allie, ones that show up on Facebook, on AIM, and on Skype.

The best one wasn't a Facebook post though, it was an e-mail from Ness. Even though she already celebrated my birthday, she sent a message including pictures from the two nights previously mentioned and a link to the song that "Michael Jackson" and Bart wrote for Lisa's birthday. And since Vanessa loves reading this blog, I felt I should mention her a lot so she knows she's special.

So that was my second 21st birthday.

As for the actual events of today that happened after it stopped being my birthday in America? I helped paint the set for a show that opened tonight, then I went to a block party and learned that Aussies don't believe in napkins (especially Vanessa), and then I saw the show that opened tonight. But that was so amazing that I'm going to save it for the next post.

In Which There is This Girl

So, there is this girl...

In Which John Counts Down the Days

On Wednesday, I had no class, so I walked through the Botanical Gradens. It was cloudy.

On Thursday, I had Media discussion. There are only 9 people in it out of the 250 in the whole class. Rarely anyone talked, so I spearheaded the discussion.

Afterwards, I auditioned for the upcoming play. It's made for new students, and there is a 99.9% chance I'll get in. There are four short plays, and I had to audition for each. I got along well with the auditionees and the auditioners. It's a lot less formal than at UMD. We were all just standing outside and reading our pieces wherever we happened to be standing.

On Friday, there was a meeting for the theater group. I had a chance of getting a position on the board of executives, but I didn't get enough votes (probably because I'm only here for a semester and it'd be unwise to put me in the committee for a short time). I met two of the people in charge of the brand new improv group on campus. They were impressed with my background (since very few people do improv here) and I'm basically an automatic member/workshop leader. Hopefully the meeting and show times don't conflict with classes too much. We had a picnic, and I got to know the members better. I learned that the musical group (which is different but basically the same as the drama group) is doing an adaptation of Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.

That night, I went out with my roommates and their friends and got to know them better. Australian girls talk about the weirdest stuff. I also realized that not only have I been rooming with a different nationality of people, but I think I've been placed into a different clique. Kind of like the girls on Bel Air 4. We're friends, but I don't really go out with them. But now, I have to go out with these kind of people. I'm slowly adjusting.

On Saturday, I spent a long time getting acquainted with the musical. I also saw Ghost Town. Did you know that in Australian movie theaters they have assigned seats?

On Sunday (today), I auditioned. For someone who sings poorly and rarely, I sang very well. Unfortunately, the director has made it quite clear that he thinks I'm perfect for a bit role as the newscaster. So, it's good that I have a high chance of getting into the show, but it would be a lot more epic to play Dr. Horrible (especially since I impressed myself with my audition song).

And now, a note about the bird noises I constantly hear:
- Some sound like velociraptors
- Some sound like Tickle-Me-Elmo
- Some sound like injured children or dying cats
- All of them terrify me

In Which John Starts Classes

The first day of classes was great. I didn't have my first class until 6 in the evening so I had time to do other things during the day (such as do laundry and drop a class).

I ate in the student area for the first time. Oh, just so you guys back home get an idea for the campus, the bookstore, travel agency, study abroad office, post office, dentist, "In-Con," cafeteria, library, and student union are all in the exact same location (often in the same building). This makes running errands very simple. The cafeteria definitely beats the Diners at UMD. There's a sandwich place, and a vegetarian place, and a cafe place, and a Mexican place, and a Thai place, among others. Australians are big on Thai. It's like the way we Americans love Mexican food. Asia is to Australia as Mexico is to America.

I booked my Spring Break trip to New Zealand (I still need to arrange flights, but at least I have one part of the process taken care of). I'll be spending 9 days there and will get to do many things. Hopefully I'll run into Jemaine or Bret.

This week is when all the organizations on campus come out to recruit the new students (by the way, Australia starts their school year in Spring, not in Fall like us, so there are new freshmen everywhere). After gathering many bibles from the 40 Christian groups, I finally found what I was looking for: the theater group. There are two, one for musicals and one for other. I joined the other (they charge a fee to join since there is no actual dept on campus, nor classes, so they have to get money somehow). It was $10, but it bought me a ticket for their upcoming show, and gives me discounts for future shows (although hopefully I'll just be in those). The first auditions are coming up next week, and the students seemed very nice and personable. I'm so glad I found them. (I also joined a film group, but they just watch films and discuss them, rather than make them. I'll still give them a chance.)

My first class was LING120: Exploring English. It's all about grammar. Several students in the class thought "how" was a verb (the correct answer was "is"). Some weren't even sure of what nouns were. This class may end up being very easy.

The second day of classes were a little less fun. My first class was Introduction to Indigenous Studies. The professor talked to us as if we were Australians with knowledge of Aboriginal Studies. Most of us were Americans, since I recognized many from the airport or the Village. We have to do one of those "finding an article a week" assignments. (In Australia, assignments are called "assessments.")

My second class was Australian Media, and it was by far the biggest class I've ever taken. In this one, we're required to watch a lot of Australian TV. That might sound like fun at first, but I think it could get tedious.

I finally signed up for all my discussion sections, so I am officially set for all of my classes. I have nothing on Wednesdays or Fridays, so I guess I can make it to the Inc Show.

In Which John Goes to a Film Festival

Friday - There was a block party. It was hot. My roommate and I wandered around, not meeting anyone. Why should we, we already met each other? I also tried Vegemite. Allie and Billy watched. I think we've found a food I don't like at all.

Saturday - Took a personal day in Sydney. Again, I wanted to take pictures, but the rain stopped me. I went through the town of Glebe and hit up the markets, including quaint bookstores. I got a cheap copy of The History of Tom Jones, A Foundling and a not-so-cheap copy of The Great Gatsby in graphic novel form, only available in Australia.

Sunday - I went to Tropfest '09. It is the world's biggest short film festival, and it was located right in Sydney. We spent all day sitting outside in the park watching the huge screens. This was also apparently the first televised event, so you guys should have watched it on TV. Every year, there is a "significant object" that must be included in the film to ensure that it was made for the festival. This year, it was "spring." Interpret that as you will (the directors certainly did). There were some celebrity judges there, including the girl from A Series of Unfortunate Events (and the recent Unborn) and the girl who will be providing Alice's voice in the upcoming Tim Burton Wonderland movie. Alas, I didn't get to see them in person, but I saw where they were sitting.

I found that the best kind of short film tells a simple story, then has some memorable twist or reveal. So without further ado, here are the 16 finalists (warning, spoilers ahead).

The News
The Plot: A woman expecting twins can't wait to tell the love of her life the good news. The man she loves also has news for her.

The Twist: The man accidentally killed the woman's sister 6 months ago, and just never found the right time to tell her.

How Spring Was Used: The twins are due in spring.

My Thoughts: I loved this one. It was very short, and at the beginning it seemed very predictable and chick-flicky. The woman prepares her news by going through the whole story of the relationship, briefly mentioning that he comforted her when her sister died. You knew that his news was not going to be pleasant, but typical story fashion would have him break up with the girl, or something cheesy like that. When he said, "I killed your sister," that gave me the biggest laugh of the night. 4 stars (out of 4)

The Delivery
The Plot: After finishing a bank heist, three criminals wait for the call to make their delivery. There is no dialouge.

The Twists: A pizza delivery guy shows up. He's actually a cop. Then one of the criminals reveals himself to also be a cop. Then another criminal shows that he is also a cop. The final criminal embarrassingly shows that he is a cop too.

How Spring Was Used: While waiting, one of the criminals relieves stress by squeezing a spring loaded stress reliever.

My Thoughts: The reveals were kind of funny, but the waiting portion took a bit too long, and without the dialogue, it was hard to tell why they were waiting in the first place. Also, without the dialogue, the volume on all of the sounds was cranked to the max, and it got annoying at times. 2 stars

Bargain!
The Plot: An awkward girl pays her sister's hot boyfriend to to sexy things for $500. He's reluctant, but figures it is an easy way to make money.

The Twist: The awkward girl actually owed her sister $500 and was just dropping it off.

How Spring Was Used: The awkward girl claims there is a loose spring in the couch so she can sit closer to the boyfriend.

My Thoughts: I actually happened to be sitting behind the director and her friends and family, so I was rooting for this one. The main story was fine, but after the reveal, the boyfriend's reaction was a bit long and drawn out. It should have just been one shot of him realizing what happened and feeling awkward. Instead we were treated to five. 3 stars

Dream What You Want
The Plot: A man lost in an empty city finds he can only escape by dreaming that he's somewhere else (a beach). Then he comes back, to find the city populated again.

The Twist: The man has a seashell from the beach, proving that it was not just a dream.

How Spring Was Used: In the city, there is some graffiti that says, "Spring '09"

My Thoughts: Maybe this film was some big metaphor for isolation or imagination. Whatever the case, the story fell victim to cliche and it just ended up being boring to watch. And the inclusion of "spring" seemed very last minute. "We were supposed to include "spring?" Oh crap! Quick, hand me that paint!" 1 star

The Furry Cheque Book
The Plot: A 40-year-old woman lives in a spacious estate after her partner left her. In order to help with the housework, she hires hunky guys and pays them in sex. It's a documentary.

The Twist: Does it need one?

How Spring Was Used: It seems to have been filmed during spring.

My Thoughts: This one just made me feel dirty. The woman's interviews are peppered with shots of random naked guys doing hard labor. This would have made for a great 60 Minutes segment. 2 stars

Song for a Comb
The Plot: A little clay man plays around with the items in a travel bag, making music, and eventually settling on using a comb as a piano.

The Twist: ...He used the comb as a piano?

How Spring Was Used: The man dismantles a pen and takes the spring out, using the empty pen as a trombone.

My Thoughts: The film was cute, but I would have enjoyed a bigger payoff, like maybe creating an orchestra with all of the items. Instead he just plays a few notes on each item, then plays a long clunky piano song. 2 stars

Jackie's Spring Palace
The Plot: A man, who seems to think his life is more epic than it is, narrates his day as he walks around in a pirate costume and eats many spring rolls. Then he gets diarrhea and soils his pants.

The Twist: He accidentally does this while in the ladies' room.

How Spring Was Used: This one was probably the best in terms of spring usage by incorporating spring rolls into the plot.

My Thoughts: It's hard to describe this one. It's kind of like watching a person's stand-up routine happen in real life. There are funny moments, but the story just jumps around, and the genre changes without warning, and you realize it is actually very jumbled. Fortunately, the funny moments are funny. 3 stars

Being Carl Williams
The Plot: Two murderers mistake the man who played Australian serial-killer Carl Williams in a TV miniseries for the actual Carl Williams, and ask for his help in killing someone.

The Twist: After witnessing the killing, the actor thinks about the interview he was having earlier in which he described his perfect weekend. Both the real and hypothetical ones end with him watching the sunset.

How Spring Was Used: Hmm, I think I forgot.

My Thoughts: The premise was really good, and they used the actual actor to play himself. By the end, no one really learned anything, and the joke of him being mistaken for Carl Williams (by the murderers, by the victim, and by some passers-by) began to wear thin. 3 stars

Blue
The Plot: A woman sneaks away from her sleeping partner while out at a winter cabin. She treks far out into the woods to have a pee. Then she smiles.

The Twist: She was taking a pregnancy test. It turned blue.

How Spring Was Used: Apparently, pregnancy is related enough to spring to count.

My Thoughts: The woman's trek into the woods took a very long time, to the point when I stopped being curious about her journey and was just hoping it wasn't leading to some big pee joke. It almost seemed that way, too. 1 stars

Fences
The Plot: A boy accompanies his detective father to a nighttime crime investigation and is told to wait in the car. But his curiosity gets the best of him.

The Twist: The boy sees something pretty gruesome probably. Then his parents fight about how he wasn't supposed to be there.

How Spring Was Used: You got me.

My Thoughts: If I wasn't thinking "What does this have to do with spring?" the whole time, I would've liked it better. 2 stars

NYE
The Plot: A girl goes missing at the New Years festivities at the Harbor Bridge.

The Twist: None. Nothing happens beyond that. It's more an emotional piece.

How Spring Was Used: A child goes missing.

My Thoughts: See "My Thoughts" for the previous film. 2 stars

One in a Million
The Plot: A boy writes a letter about how great his father is, even though his father is obviously a serial killer (he buries dead hookers in the backyard) who threatens to kill his son if he goes to the cops. Then, his son sneaks out one day, and returns with a group of people. The leader with a megaphone tells the father he'll get what he deserves.

The Twist: The boy had written the letter to a reality show called, "One in a Million" where one lucky citizen gets his house made over, starting with the lawn.

How Spring Was Used: The boy puts his pen together, spring and all.

My Thoughts: The twist was definitely funny, but you know that boy is going to be in deep trouble. 3 stars

Left Unspoken
The Plot: Two friends of 3 years, reveal their love for one another, as well as many other secrets and facts about their life.

The Twist: An atom bomb has been heading for their country.

How Spring Was Used: One of them probably mentioned spring.

My Thoughts: First it just seemed like another sappy romance story. And there was a heavy bass rumble that was annoying me throughout the whole film. But I found the revelation that the two were bracing for death to be very sweet. 3 stars

Be My Brother
The Plot: A man with Downs Syndrome initially bothers a woman and a young guy at a bus stop. He eventually charms the woman with his antics. When he tells the woman that his brother finds him embarrassing, the woman tells him that his brother could not be more wrong.

The Twist: The other guy at the bus stop was the man's brother.

How Spring Was Used: Doesn't matter.

My Thoughts: In reading this short little synopsis, the twist seems obvious, but when you're watching the movie, the thought doesn't cross your mind. Even when the two get on the bus, and sit next to each other, I just thought the young guy eventually warmed up to the man. But when the man hugs the young guy, you are hit with a wave of revelation. The movie was very sweet, and my only other favorite of the night. 4 stars

Notes From a Scaresmith
The Plot: A guy who likes to startle people finds that he can't scare his new roommate.

The Twist: The roommate is also a scaresmith and ends up scaring him. It's love.

How Spring Was Used: The guy likes jumping out at people.

My Thoughts: Although it was cute when the roommate jumps out and wrestles the guy to the bed, it was all too predictable. 2 stars

Beyond Words
The Plot: A woman notices a creepy guy wearing sunglasses staring at her during yoga class. Afterwards, she is attacked by her car. It's a thriller.

The Twists: First, we find out that the man in class is blind. Then later we learn that the woman is deaf. It's like that Richard Pryor/Gene Wilder movie.

How Spring Was Used: Once again, I forget.

My Thoughts: The style was intriguing. The plot shifted between the two points of view. There were scenes with visuals, but no sound, and then scenes with sound, but no visuals. It came clear that the second type were the blind man's point of view, but without sound, it just seemed like a normal thriller, hence the twist of the woman being deaf. 3 stars

I didn't stay to see who won. Oh well.

In Which John Learns About Beauty

Sorry, no pictures this time.

Wednesday was another low-key day, trying to rest up from the previous night and prepare for the following. I walked around campus, and realized how truly beautiful many parts of it are. The next time I have a completely free day, I am going to take so many pictures, my camera will be full of pretty pictures.

The next day was an all-day orientation. As in, "15 hours of my life are now missing." The first half of the day session was spent talking about Australia. A Native Australian (like Native American) tried to tell us about his culture, but the students were all unresponsive, resulting in a very awkward sequence in which he shouted out common American names, expecting students to come up on stage. Only a Mary, a Patrick, and 2 Johns came, out of the 20 or so names he called.

At lunch, I found the crew from UMD to sit and eat lunch with. After 20 min of realizing that they weren't going to talk to me, I went to find other people. I finally stumbled across a group of guys who were fun to talk to. Apparently, they and 60 other students where part of a Study Abroad Program who had already been here for a few weeks. This is the reason that everyone seemed to already know each other back at the barbeque.

After lunch, we learned about our class schedules. You guys back at MD have it so easy to sign up for classes. For us, we have to get permission from the teacher if we want to take their class. Then, we have to sign up for each section individually. For example, if a class has two lectures and a discussion each week, we have to sign up for each one. Sometimes lectures will be open and discussions full. So then we have to contact the teacher to get in to the discussion section. And when you are making your schedule, you can only see one class at a time. You can't see the whole schedule at once to find a place to fit a class. And if you drop a class, you have to get the student office to sign off or else you'll continue to be enrolled. Many people get F's because they thought they dropped a class.

Then we got our ID cards made. Everyone says theirs look bad. Mine looks bad. I look as if I've just been beaten up and I've been wanted for sexual offense.

That night, we were supposed to go on a cruise around the Sydney harbor. Did I tell you that every party in Australia has a theme? Well every single one has a theme. You'd think this would be my dream. But try finding an '80s outfit in your wardrobe in 2 hours, when you've only packed 2 weeks worth of clothes. Fortunately, I managed to make a Bruce Springsteen "Born in the U.S.A." costume. I was proud of myself.

I traveled by bus with the group of 60 people, and I was having fun mingling with them. And when we got to the Sydney Opera House, the weather was magnificent, and it was clear this was going to be a fun night.

Highlights of the Cruise: At nighttime, when the harbor lights up, the experience is breathtaking. I had forgotten my camera as I rushed to make the bus for the cruise, so I'll have to return for Sydney for that.

Lowlights of the Cruise: There's a reason I'm not a fan of huge parties. I feel that I can communicate and bond with people better on a personal level through talking. Talking is my comfort zone. At a party, there is loud music, heavy drinking, and a large number of people. The only way to communicate is through shouting, or physical communication.

I think we should all just accept the fact that I'm not going to be a drinker. I hate the taste of alcohol, and I fear what I'll do if I ever drink enough to lose control of my judgment. On the small cruise boat filled with 200 people, 99% were drinking, and those remaining were either pretty people getting hit on, or good friends with the drinkers. I have not known any of the people long enough to become friends with them before they all got wasted. So I opted to just enjoy the cruise and take in the sights, and block out the loud noises and cigarette smells (occassionally I was put in charge of photographer for...everyone). I tried to keep telling myself that I wasn't fitting in because I've been spending all my time with Australians, as opposed to the rest of the Americans, which is what I wanted, right? It must have become evident that I was not enjoying myself, because at one point, a guy from UMD slapped me on the back and simply said, "Buy yourself a drink and have fun," then walked away. That's when I cried.

Don't worry, no one noticed. I was leaning against the wind, facing away from the party. And it wasn't long. Just enough to make me realize how deeply I had let his words affect me. But I felt safe at the edge of the boat. I wasn't homesick. I was just a little tired of the human race for a bit. I've never felt so alone. But at the edge of the boat, when I could only see the beauty of the Harbor, I felt powerful. I felt that this image was mine. Everyone else was missing out. They didn't notice how swiftly the waves moved, or how enchanting the amusement park seemed. I was experiencing magic.

Then a girl came over and introduced herself. She said she was trying to meet everyone at the party. I knew that wasn't true, but I talked to her anyway. Another girl, from Austria, also joined our conversation. She was the only Austrian at the party, and I knew that everything I was feeling was not unique. She must have felt even more isolated, being the only one from her country. But she was making the most of it, taking pictures of everything. It was charming. Then the girls eventually went on their ways. The Austrian girl came back at one point to tell me I looked tired. I guess I was. It was 10pm, and I was ready to get off the boat.

When we all disembarked, I did not really want to go back with the people I had come with. But I didn't know my way back to the bus stop. A couple of girls from the Hawaii episode saw that I looked lost, and told me to join their group as we went to find a bus. They had a guy friend who was trying to cheer me up by saying how he used to be the non-drinker at parties, but the trick to having a good time is to just goof around and act like you've been drinking so that you fit in. He clearly missed the point.

After an hour, we finally found the bus stop. Their group took a taxi back, but I did not want to pay for another cab so I waited for the bus. Through stupid details I'd rather not get into, the bus never came for another hour and a half. Everyone left in taxis. I finally had to join the three remaining students on their taxi ride. And again, they lived at the opposite end of campus.

So I had to walk back again, just like the other night. But this time, I was without my family.

In Which John Spends a Day in Sydney and John Spends a Night in Sydney

Nothing of note happened on Monday, save for my final roommates moving in. There's Vanessa, the 3rd Aussie and Matt, an American. They are opposites.


The next day, I got to go on a tour of Sydney. It was a cheesy bus ride full of photo-ops.

See, here, I'm blocking the Sydney Opera House, because I'm more important.


As you can see, it was still cloudy and blah, so that made for a nice small tour group. However, it was full of very tired and jet lagged people, so there was not a lot of conversation or mingling. I met a girl from Norway. Whee.


(Before this trip, I was accidentally standing in line for a bus to another tour, where the people were a lot more talkative, and I probably would've bonded a lot better.)


We went to the Harbor, and Bondi Beach, and the Gap, which are big cliffs that serve as the doorway to the Harbor. Many people commit suicide off of these cliffs. What a cheery tour.


It seems as though I have more pictures from the beginning of the day than I do interesting stories, so I'll just place them into the nighttime section of the story. Don't get confused.


That evening, the 3 girls and I went back into Sydney on a pub crawl with their friends. That's the equivalent of bar-hopping, where we visit many bars in one night. Oh, the girls get very dressed up by the way, so if you're ever in Australia and plan on a night out, be fancy. Matt was no where to be found, so he didn't come.


When we arrived at the first pub, the main group was already leaving, so I don't have much to say about that one.


At the second bar, I spent most of the time talking to this redhead from Wisconsin, bonding over our Americanness. It was nice to have an extended conversation with someone who wasn't Australian for a change, so I thought that this night might be fun after all. However, this was the only bar in which we talked.


At the third bar, I ended up talking to this really nice bloke named Chris, and a group of 3 other Aussie girls. They were very nice and open, and filled with wonder about America, and gave me tips on what to do while in Australia. I didn't remember seeing these people at the bar from the other night, but I was grateful for them. However, when I mentioned who my roommates were, they had no idea who I was talking about. It turns out that the pub crawl was sponsored by their dormitory and was supposed to be a "getting to know you" field trip for freshmen. My roommates and I just crashed it. I have nothing against freshmen, but I wanted to mingle with people my own age, who were all sticking to themselves, and not interacting with the newbies.


By the time we got to the 4th bar, it was getting very late. All of the freshmen were tired and wanted to go home. I wanted to go home. My roommates wanted to go home. But we had to wait for the bus that would drive us all back to campus, which wouldn't come for another hour and a half.


Once it was time to leave, we all learned that the bus wasn't coming. That's okay, we could just use a regular bus, right? No, they all stopped running an hour ago. Fortunately, the trip sponsors arranged for a wave of taxis to pick up everyone, and the school would cover the charge.

Unfortunately, remember how I said my roommates and I crashed this event? We weren't going to get a free taxi ride. Vanessa, however, devised a plan in which we just get into a taxi, acting like we were with the dorms, and just get dropped off there and walk the rest of the way. So we did, and managed to convince the taxi driver that we lived in the dorms. It got a little scary when, in order to keep our lie valid, my drunk roommate kept on talking about how much she lives in the dorms. Not "loves living," but "lives." When we finally arrived at the dorm, the taxi driver told us that we'd have to pay for the ride, and he'd give us a receipt so that the dorm would pay us back.


So our plan was foiled. We didn't cheat the taxi system. And I had to pay for the $50 cab ride, since my roommates had no cash. Plus, we were now across campus, away from where we actually lived, so we had to walk another 15 min in the rain.


This was probably my favorite part of the night, though. My roommates and I bonded on that walk. We made the best of the rain. And I got to hear their true feelings about all of their friends and the people they met that night. They said I was one of them. I was their brother now. It's like Raincloud Village, down here.









P.S. The code word is "Penguin" if your bra is showing.

In Which Friday the 13th Disappears

After 48 hours of leaving MD, I finally arrived in Sydney. We skipped right over Friday, and came in on Valentine's Day morning. I saw Matt P. at the airport. He said, "Hey."

With the harrowing plane escapade behind me, I could look forward to settling into Australia. Rainy, rainy Australia. I missed out on my trip into the Blue Mountains, but I did get to meet two roommates, Laura and Sophie, both Australian.

Valentine's Day was mostly spent unpacking and watching Australian television with the roommates. They love American and British shows. Even Fawlty Towers! I mean, I know it's a great show, but you try finding a group of Americans who get excited over Fawlty Towers.

I skyped with Allison, which was very nice and nostalgic, while Roo checked out the room.

"We're here! ...Why don't I see any kangaroos? All I see is a tree," Roo dejectedly observed.

Don't worry. We'll see kangaroos soon. Maybe tomorrow.

"Tomorrow," however, was much rainier than the first day. I spent a majority of the day watching television with Laura. There was a reality show called "The Family." It was just about a family. The preteen son pierced his own ear. And the cat went missing. That was the plot of that episode.

An American named Oliver moved in to our apartment, took a shower, then moved out.

That night was the Village orientation barbeque. (The Village is the community where I live, right next to campus). We were supposed to mingle, but it was full of Americans who just talked to the people they knew from home. So rather than stick around, my roommates and I went to a bar to hang out with their own friends.

This was my first time in a bar, and it was interesting. As a "welcome back to campus" celebration, everyone got 3 free drinks (because, if you're in college in Australia, you're old enough to drink). Roo did not get carded. It was hard to get to know my roommates friends though, because everyone was getting loud and tipsy, so there were a few awkward moments. A point of saving grace occured when two American girls from the airplane came by and the drunkest of them started "sexy dancing" all over the place, causing the Australians to gawk and shout at the "crazy American." I just hung out with her sober friend, trying to maintain dignity for our country.

At the end, everyone got free pails.

What I learned from the night was that Australian girls are funny and witty (more so than American girls, who are drunk).

What Roo learned was how to limit himself.

In Which John Spends a Day in Hawaii

Apparently, there was some mechanical issue with the plane, resulting in an unplanned trip to Honolulu. We arrived at 6am. The next plane to Sydney wouldn't leave until 11:45pm. Since waiting at the airport was out of the question, United Airlines provided free accomodations at a hotel near Wakiki Beach and told us to have fun for the day.

"Does this mean we'll never get to Australia?" asked Roo.


Don't worry, we'll be there tomorrow. We'll miss out on all the stuff I had planned for us to do, like barbeques and hiking in the Blue Mountains. But look at where we are! This island is beautiful!

I held Roo up to the window and he looked out. The weather was beautiful. The ocean was gorgeous. The air smelled wonderful. I proposed that we go and have an adventure.

"I'd rather stay here. If it's not Australia, then I don't want to be out there."

Suit yourself.

As we checked into the hotel, I started making plans with Brooke and others from the plane about what we'd do that day. Then I saw Pierre Chang in the lobby. For those of you who don't watch Lost, you should. Mr. Chang is a character in the show who is shrouded in a lot of mystery, especially with his connections to the Dhrama Initiative and the island. Lost is filmed in Hawaii, so it was not unusual to see one of the actors at our hotel. But it was still cool.

After getting showered, I planned to find my new friends and spend a day at the beach. Unfortunately, I couldn't find them. So instead I had some breakfast, provided free from the hotel, and then went outside to go on a personal excursion. That's when I saw my friends return. They forgot to come get me when they left for the beach and now they wanted to nap. No problem, I thought. I could still enjoy the weather by myself.

When I was a block away from the hotel, it started raining. HARD. I returned to my hotel room drenched and miserable.

"Why did you go swimming with your clothes on?" asked Roo.

I ignored him and decided to fool around on the internet in the hotel room after getting changed.

After watching Lost, I decided to give my "friends" another chance. They had just woken up from their nap, just in time for lunch.

I was still full from breakfast, so agreed to join them and keep them company. They wanted to eat at a Chinese restaurant located in the hotel. The restaurant was closing their lunch service in two minutes, but they still let us in. What followed can only be described as sheer madness.

As soon as we sat down, a waitress came by with a cart with a couple of food items on it and asked which we wanted. After turning down the first item, we chose the second item and another waitress with a cart came up to me. She showed me some of her food and I tried to turn it away as a third cart arrived with more food. Five carts visited us in a span of 15 seconds. I made it out alive with only tofu in coconut milk. My friends weren't so lucky, as they had piles of dumplings and other appetizers crowding their places.

We didn't dare open up the menu.

After lunch, we strolled back down to the beach and had a loverly time sunbathing and strolling in the water.

The rest of the day was spent relaxing and getting dinner, but as Brooke often pointed out, this was not Australia. We needed to get back to where we were going.

After the sunset, the 300 of us from the plane gathered up our belongs and swapped stories of the day. Some people went whale watching, others went to Pearl Harbor, and some just slept all day.

Hawaii was a nice little detour, but Roo was getting very anxious and insisted we go to Australia.

The problem with spending a day in Hawaii was that we had to go through the whole airport process again. Almost everything was the same. Even the in-flight entertainment. Apparently Bill Murray was in some recent movie called City of Ember. I've never heard anything about this movie before, but now I've seen it twice with the sound off. Think "Stardust" meets "Alien from L.A.", Max.

Ever since Lost started, I always look at the group of people I get onto a plane with, and think about how we'd survive a crash together as a group. What factions would form? I learned today that all the old people stick with old people, all the young people stick with young people, and all the pilots would stay far away from the passengers, lest they get yelled at. Roo and Brooke both had some choice words for the pilot. Apparently "Heffalump" and "Woozle" are Hundred Acre Wood cuss words.

In Which John Does Not Arrive in Australia and Finds a Stowaway in His Luggage

As I was finishing my packing, I heard a voice squeak beside me.


"Where did I come from?" asked the baby Roo.


I knelt down beside him and explained that all kangaroos come from a place all the way on the other side of the globe called Australia. In fact, I told him, I was going there that moment, to study and appreciate the land.


"I wanna come too!" squeaked Roo.


Sorry, but you need to have a ticket if you want to go. I have to fly for almost 24 hours just to get there. It's very expensive, and sure to be a gruelling process. I'll take you when you're older.


"I'm old enough! I want to fly!"


But he was just wasting his breath. I loaded up the car, drove to the airport, and after saying goodbye to my parents at check-in, I made my way through to the gate. I sat and waited to see if I saw anyone I recognized from UMD. One person looked familiar, but it was a false identification. I decided to reach into my backpack and pull out my iPod to listen to U2: Songs About Airports.

"Uh-oh!" yelped Roo.


Roo! You aren't supposed to be here! How will I explain you to Customs?!


But the little animal couldn't take much yelling (he is a baby, after all). And so, in order to prevent a scene from occuring, I zipped the bag back up to muffle the sobs.


Okay, I whispered through the backpack, you can come, but you'll have to be very quiet. It'll be a long trip to Los Angeles and an even longer trip to Australia. So don't get cranky.


He stayed fairly quiet during the 6 hour trip to LA. I did let him out to enjoy the view. Oh, it was marvelous! We left when the sun was setting, and since we were travelling west, the sun didn't finish setting until 2 and a half hours later. The sky was a very rich rainbow for a majority of the time (I tried to get a picture, but it was hard to make it look right from the plane.) The bottom layer was the dark cloud level, then a very deep blood red, followed by a layer of orange and yellow, then that weird part where the sky tries to be green but just ends up being brown, then blue and finally the purple night.


And then the night sky! It was great when there weren't any clouds below because then the city lights from the ground couldn't be separated from the stars in the sky. If I ignored gravity, it was like we were travelling through space. That flight was magical.


Then came the flight to Australia. It was supposed to be 14 hours, and I told Roo it might get very uncomfortable if he doesn't situate himself right. Right off the bat, I noticed that people on the flight to Australia were very friendly and talkative. A lot of people my age where travelling to study abroad. I even saw one of the girls from UMD sitting a row behind me (her name's Brooke, with a K). One of the girls sitting next to me was already drunk. I talked with a nice boy who was sitting across the aisle from me. He seemed a lot like Vinnie, for those of you who know Vinnie.

"Vinnie-the-Pooh?" asked Roo, as I typed this. Kind of, I said back.


Well, right before we took off, the pilot said we'd have an hour delay. Oh well, that shouldn't be a problem. 4 hours later we took off. By this point, I could tell I had gone mad. I kept cracking up everytime I realized that the plane hadn't moved yet. I wanted to fall asleep so that we'd be in the air once I woke up, but I couldn't. I was too giddy with annoyance. Roo had already chewed through the backpack and started roaming the aisles out of boredom and frustration. I was pretty upset, because the late start meant that I'd have to miss the orientation barbeque and deal with the shuttle service from the airport informing them of my late arrival.


I've never travelled alone before,and this was starting to worry me.


But, once we were in the air, I decided whatever happens will happen, and I should stop worrying. Things were fine until 6 hours into the second flight when the pilot said "We will now begin our decent into Hawaii."


What? I squeaked.